Liz’s rant: The wine rack

You guys know how fond I am of bringing you weird things, lest we forget “You go, girl.” Not one to disappoint, I’m back with another product that I really should have seen coming. Alas I did not. Now before we get into this one, I would be remiss if I didn’t point out that there are several portable beverage products on the market. So the portable part isn’t new. But the implementation is.

To what do I refer? The wine rack. Yep, the wine rack is a new bra that holds up to 25 ounces (or 750mls) of your favorite beverage. It comes complete with a drinking tube, and is the surest way to go from flat to  fabu if you are a woman who is perhaps, uh, not very well endowed. (Who needs a boob-job? Just get the wine rack and you’ll have your own rack.)

Take a bottle of wine, a mixed drink or even a fifth of your favorite hard stuff to the movies, concerts, ball games, even PTA meetings. Sporting a rack that will turn heads and serving a beverage that will have guys standing in line for a sip of your secret stash!

With simple blow into the tube it’s easy to keep that full look even as you drink from your secret stash.

I’m sure we can all agree that the ability to blow into the tube to keep your double Ds is a stroke of sheer genius. Heaven forbid you’re sitting at a PTA meeting getting trashed on a fifth of rum and your boobs start to deflate. Oh the horror. Sigh…

The Wine Rack is one of a gazillion products carried by Baron Bob, who has been “crusading against the common gift since 1998.” And by all accounts, it looks like he has succeeded. Ol’ Baron Bob has also given us the Beer Belt, the Beer Belly, a motorized “cruzin cooler” and the Wheel of Intoxication.

If we know anything for sure, it’s that Baron Bob will see to it that you don’t go thirsty. Of course, after drinking all that fluid stashed in your bra,  you may find yourself looking for a little girl’s room for some relief. Which leads me to believe the Wine Rack and GoGirl are a match made in Heaven.

-Liz