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I trust you’re all out and about, celebrating freedom on this July 4. Let the fireworks begin! Meanwhile, let’s get to some of this week’s other holidays.

Oh, the irony with these first two.

Chocolate Day and Tell the Truth Day both happen to fall on July 7. I trust you see the problem with this.  If it’s Chocolate Day, it only stands to reason that we should (wait for it…) eat chocolate.

But here’s the caveat: you’ll have to fess up as to just how much chocolate melts in your mouth. Otherwise, you will be in direct contradiction with this day’s other holiday. I really don’t see any way around this one, people. So my suggestion is quite simple: eat chocolate in moderation, today.

Next up, get ready for quite a bizarre piece of history as I bring to your attention Martyrdom of the Bab Day. (I’d never heard of it, either.) Long story (fairly) short. This day, which goes back to events that took place at high noon on July 9, 1850, is commemorated by Baha’is as a solemn holy day, with “no parallel in history,” it’s been written, “save for the crucifixion of Jesus.”

The Bab had been imprisoned for several years before his execution. On the day of his death, one of his followers fell to his feet to profess his belief and willingness to follow the Bab.  So they are both strung up from ropes in the middle of a town, where 10,000 or so of the villagers supposedly lined up to watch the execution (what was wrong with these people?). Anyway, some 750 soldiers served as firing squad (not kidding) and commenced to open fire.

After the smoke cleared, there stood the follower, unscathed. The Bab was back in his old prison cell, finishing up a conversation. You’d think the leaders woulda had second thoughts about killing the two men. But no. So with the jail cell conversation complete, both men were once again strung up in the center of town. This time, neither lived to tell their story.

Lightening things up a bit, July 10 is Clerihew Day, thusly named for Edmund Clerihew Bentley. He apparently liked to write four-line ditties with the AABB rhyming sequence. For example:

My old friend Mark

who fell prey to a shark,

He lived on a farm

remembered full of charm.

(Yawn…)

Thankfully, we aren’t quite done, yet. The 10th is also Don’t Step on a Bee Day, apparently created beeas a warning to children who frolic around the yard in bare feet during the hot and hazy days of summer.

Might I suggest that instead of taking any chances and running around barefoot, set up a bunch of plastic toy bees throughout the house and see who can squash the most. Obviously, the perfect celebratory food would be honey. Hmmm. I wonder what would happen if you put honey on a bee sting?

Until next week, get your party on!

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