Even for those of you prone to that perpetual angelic state of being, you’d have to admit the best way to celebrate is by doing something you know is off limits, knowing that since it’s National Get out of the Doghouse Day, no one can stay mad at you for long. (Remember that timeless advice: ask for forgiveness, not permission…)

July 23 is Hot Enough For Ya Day, to which I can currently respond, “no, it isn’t.”

With highs in the upper 60s and lows in the upper 40s and low 50s, it is far from being hot enough. This is mid-July, after all – not late fall. My advice is to store this little holiday away until later in the summer, when (one would hope) the temperatures rebound into the 90s or better.

Here’s a holiday you won’t have to wait to celebrate: Cow Appreciation Day, which falls on July 25 (depending on who you ask). Before going any further, I should point out that this holiday is celebrated on at least four different days. Apparently, it depends on who you ask. I say the 25th sounds like a good day to celebrate.

This seems to be one of the most well-rounded holidays out there. What is there not to appreciate? Good ol’ Besse gives us milk and cheese, burgers and rib-eyes, coats and couches, wallets and shoes.

Not to mention they’re really cute to look at, too. Try driving by a herd of cattle, minding their own business, standing in a pond or grazing on a hillside. Tell me that’s not endearing. (Yeah, you may have to hold your nose, but that’s hardly the point now, is it?)

Talk about your versatility. Cows are cool.

It should go without saying that this one is gonna be an all-day celebration, beginning with an ice cold glass of milk. I don’t like milk, so I’ll have ice cream. I told you cows were versatile! Go to a leather store and soak up the smell of the rawhide. Heck – treat yourself to a new wallet or purse, and thank that cow for it’s service!

Dinner should be a no-brainer. Fire up the grill and throw on your choice of beef. If you go the burger route, add a little cheese, too.

After dinner, take a drive out into the country (or for those of you lucky enough to live there, look out your window) and watch the cows.

Some will say this is a good day to hug or kiss a cow as well, although I don’t recommend going to that extreme. Perhaps you could organize a cow pattie throwing contest instead.

Just make sure the patties are completely dried out…

Until next week, get your party on!

Enjoy your Coffee Break!

National Get out of the Doghouse Day is this day as well. I hope none of you find yourself in the position of needing to get out of the doghouse, but if you’ve done something that met with disapproval, today’s the day to play the appropriate “get out of jail free” card and leave the doghouse to the true canines among us.

Spooner’s – or Spoonerisms – Day is on deck for July 22. You probably utter spoonerisms from time to time, although you may not know that’s what it’s called. The term comes from Reverend William Archibald Spooner, who staused quite a cur with all his wixed up mords.  It’s a slip of the tongue that skews a couple of words like this:

• hog douse
• dack boor
• rinner dolls
• perry chie

Here are some father ramous spooners from Squidoo:

One of the oldest and best known Spoonerisms in radio was uttered by announcer Harry Von Zell in the early 1930s: “Ladies and gentlemen, the President of the United States, Hoobert Heever.”

Another announcer once solemnly intoned, “All the world was thrilled by the marriage of the Duck and Doochess of Windsor.”

As Queen Elizabeth II sailed into Sydney Harbour aboard the royal yacht Brittania, an excited announcer said, “…and there goes the 21-sun galute.”

It was once announced that word of an impending presidential veto came from “a high White Horse souse.”

I’m sure you can see that celebrating this day could be a fot of lun!

Hot Enough For Ya Day is July 23, and judging by the extended forecast, I’m gonna go out on a limb and say, “Why yes, it is. Thanks for asking.”

We’ll wrap up the week with National Drive-thru Day on the 24th From fast food to prescriptions to a bottle of wine, you can find just about anything at a drive-thru. I say let’s “drive-thru” and get milk shakes!

Until next week, get your party on!

Moving through the other definitions, the word is also defined as an intelligent-type/not-well liked (enter black square-framed glasses taped in the middle.) Last in the definitions, there’s the expert or enthusiast in a specific field (computer geek, for example).

I mention this because July 13  is Embrace Your Geekness Day. While biting off the heads of live chickens and snakes is hardly up my alley, I propose we celebrate today by buying a pair of black-framed, thick plastic glasses. Wear them all day, everywhere you go, while proclaiming, “I embrace my geekness!” in a loud voice. This will not work without the duct or masking tape across the bridge – especially since that style of frame seems to be vogue again.

To further the celebration, pick something electronic (in my case, I’ll choose something that is already broken). Take it apart, put it back together and you’ll be geeky good to go. Just remember not to confuse this day with Dork Day or Nerd Day. That would be an entirely different celebration… sort of…

Gummi Worm Day is July 15 – which also happens to be my youngest son’s birthday. Happy Birthday, Red!

Back to the worms. I’ve got to go with chocolate pudding and crunched up Oreos with multi-colored gummie bears sticking out of the dirt. Not real original, but time-tested (and tasted). It’s also a great day to experiment with the super-sour gummi worms if you haven’t already tried those. The perfect between-meals snack – at least for today.

It seems as if we’re on another food holidays roll, here. July 16 is Hot Dog Night. It’s a holiday so well-loved in one Minnesota city that they’ll be serving up 10,000 free hot dogs. That’s just the beginning, though. The festivities also include the 6th Annual Wiener Dog Race, followed by the wiener dog beauty contest. Hard to believe it’s legal to have that much fun on one day, isn’t it?

Well, here’s the real caveat, and I’m sure you knew it was coming… Apparently, cancerproject.org has declared war on the weiners. Take a look at this billboard that graced the roadsides in St. Louis last year:

Oddly enough, July 17 is National Hot Dog Day, according to some holiday pundits. All I can say is eat ‘em if you got ‘em… Next year, both of these holidays,  not to mention the puzzling question of why there are eight buns in a package versus 10 dogs per package could be a mute point.

Until next week,  get your party on!

Moving right along, remember when Take Your Children To Work Day was in its height of popularity? Okay, it wasn’t really a high height – more like a molehill. No wonder. I’ve been there, done that on a daily basis in my profession. It wasn’t just me – all the staff with school-aged children were allowed to bring them to work after school.

It was a great idea, not to mention money-saver, where the parents were concerned, but I doubt some of the other members of the staff were all aglow over the situation. Maybe it was hardest on the parents, though. I always felt as if I was on pins and needles from 3:15 until 5 p.m.

So June 28th’s holiday seems to be the perfect cure. It’s Please Take My Children to Work Day. Ergo, your children go off to work with a neighbor or spouse – whatever. And you get to go to work (or the spa or the mall) for a few hours of solace.

This holiday stands to be so popular (assuming you play your cards right) that it could evolve into, oh, say a weekly holiday.

And it does come at a fairly good time, considering that July 1 is Second Half of the Year Day. I see that name and immediately start making lists: Christmas lists, things to get done before Fall lists, back-to-school shopping lists…

You’re definitely gonna want some quiet time while the kids go to work with someone else just to get a head start on 210 Part Two.

The day after we begin the second half of the year, we get to celebrate I Forgot Day – the perfect day for that person who didn’t take your kids to work to tell you, “Oops – I forgot.”

Moving right along, July 3 is Compliment Your Mirror Day. Note to the wise: don’t accept any shiny red apples from strangers – and you may want to be on the lookout for any mirrors that talk back to you…

Until next week, get your party on!

~Liz

The classic drug store refreshment counter.

I have fond memories of Dad and I going to the Rexall drug store. Back then, (when the store was in existence) it had a full soda fountain/counter/ cooking grill inside. What a treat to go with Dad, sit on those red stools and order a root beer float!

Finally Summer Day follows on June 21. Honestly, it has felt like summer for several weeks, now. Come to think of it, I don’t seem to recall us having a spring. We just jumped straight into summer, 95-degree heat and 105-degree heat indexes. I am determined not to complain, though, for in a few short months, we’re just as likely to  skip fall and move directly into winter’s cold. Yuck. I’ll take the heat, thank you, and welcome the first official day of summer.

Things really start er, heating up on June 22 as we celebrate Stupid Guy Thing Day. Who among us (especially those of the female persuasion) can’t relate to this day? I mean really. My son is already a pro at stupid guy things, like using his arm pit and opposite hand to see how gross of  a sound he can make or burping loudly and unnecessarily, all the while cackling with laughter. Stupid guy things for sure. And as we all know, the list could go on and on. (And you men know exactly who you are, don’t you??)

Luckily for you men, Let it Go Day is June 23, meaning as obnoxious as you were the day before, we’re willing to let it go on this day. Of course, depending on the severity of the stupid guy thing, letting go may not be all that easy.

Take Your Dog to Work Day is also celebrated on June 23. Many people take their dogs to work every day. Usually they own the business and call their own shots. If that’s not the case for you, take the dog to work if you’d like, assuming you’d also like to seek out other employment. Perhaps that’s why we all get another shot at doing the right thing on June 26. Anyone who was  crazy enough to take their dog to work without permission has a shot at redemption, and the guys, if they were really out of line, have an opportunity to make amends once and for all on Forgiveness Day.

It’s a fairly busy week to be sure, but I think you guys are up to the task. Until next week, get your party on!

June 16 ushers in Bloomsday. At first glance, you’re probably thinking this one has something to do with flowers and summertime and all things nature. Nope. This day is named in honor of a character (from a novel) whose last name was Leopold Bloom. (You may have heard of the book: Ulysses, by James Joyce.) Here’s a brief summary:

The novel recounts the hour-by-hour events of one day in Dublin—June 16, 1904—as an ordinary Dubliner, Leopold Bloom, wends his way through the urban landscape, the odyssey of a modern-day Ulysses.

Streets, shops, pubs, churches, bridges—something of Dublin pops up on nearly every page. The city is always in our peripheral vision no matter how notoriously impenetrable Joyce’s prose becomes.

I guess you can imagine how this one is celebrated. People from all over the world re-enact Bloomsday as it played out in the book. Kind of a What Would Bloom Do? Day, if you will. Here’s more from  infoplease.com:

Bloomsday—June 16th—is an annual celebration among Joyce fans throughout the world, from Fort Lauderdale to Melbourne. It is celebrated in at least sixty countries worldwide, but nowhere so imaginatively, of course, as in Dublin. There the events of Leopold Bloom’s day are reenacted by anyone who cares to participate, and his itinerary is followed all across Dublin.

At lunchtime it’s traditional to stop off for a glass of burgundy and a Gorgonzola sandwich at Davy Byrne’s Pub on Duke Street, just as Bloom did. In the afternoon the Ormond Hotel is the spot for an afternoon pint, where Bloom was tempted by the barmaids in the Sirens chapter.

The years since 1904 have made an exact replication of Bloom’s route impossible—Bloom’s home at 7 Eccles Street no longer exists and the red-light district (“Nighttown”), in which the hallucinatory Circe chapter takes place, has been leveled; only the street pattern remains.

Bloomsday celebrations also feature readings of Ulysses, James Joyce lookalike contests, various other semi-literary activities, and a good excuse for hoisting a few Guinnesses. In the eyes of many, it’s easier and a lot more fun than trying to work your way through Ulysses.

June 18 is International Panic Day, which if memory serves, is also celebrated in March. The most troubling aspect of this one is that it’s an internationally accepted day to panic. So let’s hope for the best. The 18th is also National Splurge Day. So my theory is, if you splurge properly on this day – you know – you go all out, eating everything in sight or spending money you don’t have – there will be plenty of reasons to panic.

We’ll wrap things up with National Hollerin’ Contest Day, which falls on June 19. In its 42nd year, the contest takes place in the sleepy little town of Spivey’s Corner, NC., population of about 50. Yep, 50. (Some population counts show as many as 200-400, but I believe they are also including the people of Harrells, NC. ). Anywho, on this date, thousands ‘cram the corner’, if you will for a jam packed day that includes hollerin’, tractor-pulling, corn-holing, music-playing, food-eating fun.

Hollerin’ contests include:

Whistlin’
Conch Shell Blowin’ (open to all ages)
Junior Hollerin’
Teen Hollerin’
Ladies’ Callin’
National Hollerin’ Contest

So if you’re in the area, be sure to, uh… holler!

Until next week, get your party on!

Moving along to June 8, get ready for Upsy Daisy Day. (How stupid is this?) Yourdictionary.com defines the term this way:

upsy-daisy definition

upsy-daisy (up′sə dā′zē, up′sē-)

interjection

up you go: used playfully or for reassurance, as in lifting a small child

We’ll wrap things up with Crowded Nest Awareness Day, which falls on June 12. This day makes me think of the times when there are about 17 neighborhood kids traipsing through the house, making far too much noise and driving me one step closer to insanity as I scream, “You’re crowding my nest! Out!”

I suppose one could also observe this day if the size of your family has surpassed the size of your house. If so, I could hook you up with a realtor.

Just remember that a crowded nest now will one day be followed by an empty nest. So let’s enjoy the overcrowding while we can!

Until next week, get your party on!

Say Something Nice Day is June 1 – as is National Go Barefoot Day. (Hopefully my neighbor will be back by then, saving me from having to be nice to the cat twice in one week. Nevertheless, these two holidays could prove a little tricky if you’re celebrating the latter holiday and step on a sharp object. Just saying, that if I step on something painful (think glass, rusty nail, etc), I doubt I’ll have anything nice to say. You’ve been warned.

Ever find yourself asking what’s in a name? As in seriously, how did a person get that name?? I mention this because National Bubba Day is June 2, in honor of all people who are named Bubba. It’s probably best if I just leave this one alone…

This Saturday, June 5, is a very special day indeed! It’s Kate’s Birthday Day!! That’s right – our favorite movie reviewer, cheater recipe writer and adventure-taker extraordinaire was born on this date many, many years ago, meaning she’s really, really old, now. (Heeheeeheee.) So try to be nice to her today. (OK, truth: she’s barely a year older than me – and we all know I’m 29…).

So Happy Birthday, Kate!! Wishing you a splendid birthday and many, many more!!

Until next week, get your party on!

-Liz

So I’m taking the week off. Why bore you with a bunch of holidays that don’t inspire a party atmosphere and leave you, well, let down.

I did decide to make up my own holiday, and I’d encourage you to follow suit. Wednesday, May 26 was originally the last day of school for the kids. But because of snow (and the fact that the powers that be don’t schedule snow days into the school schedule), school is in session until June 4. They’re probably lucky they aren’t going through the 4th of July, quite frankly.

So on that note, I’m proclaiming May 26 as This is What Happens When You Wish for Snow Days Day. It’s a day that will remind my children of every time they said, “I hope it snows so we don’t have school.” Seemed like more times than not, they got their wish. And we had a snow day.

Now it’s payback. A clear indication that we should be careful what we wish for.  As the week is tacked on to their school year, I will happily remind them that while they’re still studying their little buns off, I’ll be out playing in the sunshine.

Heck, I might even write a little song to celebrate this day (perhaps I should stretch it out to include the entire week…). Certainly we’ll pull out movies that involve snow, snow and more snow. Maybe make some s’mores and have some hot chocolate, to remind them that they are still paying for all those snow days.

On that note, I invite all of you to take advantage of this decided lull in the world of wacky holidays and create a special day just for you and your family. Let me know what it is, and perhaps we can get some of them on our own calendar for future purposes of partying!

Until next week, get your party on!

I’ve owned a lot of pets in my day – turtles, frogs, hermit crabs, dogs, cats, horses. But I never had sea monkeys. They’ve been around for more years than I have, though, hitting store shelves and TV commercials since 1960. I remember them looking like part monkey/part human/part sea horse. Apparently, these “instant pets” are some breed of brine shrimp, which really bursts my bubble. What’s worse, from what I’ve been able to find out about sea monkeys, most owners are unable to get them to hatch in the first place. Boring. But because I never owned sea monkeys, my opinion is merely conjecture, so let’s move right along.

May 17th is Pack Rat Day. No doubt this is a day that I can relate to, as I’m sure many of us can. I hate throwing things out – birthday cards, every piece of homework and artwork the kids ever did, or a broken dish that no longer has enough pieces to glue it back together in the first place. I’m sure you get the point. It’s a wicked habit. And one I’m clearly not willing to break at this point.

After a full day of celebrating my desires to keep things whether I need them or not, it seems quite appropo that May 18 is No Dirty Dishes Day. I envision using paper plates and cups all day, then promptly tossing them into the trash. I have to do something to make up for my perpetual status as a pack rat.

Turn Beauty Inside Out Day is May 19. What exactly does that mean, do you think? Take your natural beauty (and we all know you’re all beautiful) and ugly yourself up? OK, I doubt that. I assume it’s a reminder that beauty is on the inside. And if you feel pretty inside, you’ll turn that beauty outside for the whole world to see. Sounds kinda sappy to me.

Next up, grab a pencil and paper – May 21 is National Memo Day. I write lots of memos to myself, for various reasons. Unfortunately I usually can’t remember where I put the memo. Oddly enough, the other day I was perusing an old note book and found lots of “take a memo” moments. Too bad they were all about three years old…

Until next week, get your party on!

-Liz